yearning to venture beyond the horizons

im being bombed by not very nice news every other day. the other day, i broke down due a unpardonable mistake on my part. it may well have ruined my academic future. then few days later, i receive news that my mentor from my freelance company had a stroke relapse. followed by news of a death of a fren's fren. then came stories of relationship breakups.


whats next...


even though all these news do not affect me directly, i still feel that ache, that pinch, that bitterness. and of cos, questions of why them of all people bombarded me.


questions of fate and death, sickness and happiness, them and not me.


luckily my brother's deep interest in Budhhism has brought me some relief and simplifies otherwise life's complicated issues.


on sunday for two hours straight whilst ironing clothes, i had nothing to do but think what i can do with the rest of the holidays. i do not have any concrete plans, yet i feel im wasting every single precious day when others can put them to better use, in place of me. imagine people who only have a ticking time bomb attached to them. it makes me ashamed of how i lead my life.


to my frens, please keep having faith that tomorrow will be a better day. and despite how amazingly crazy jam-packed schedules, please try to let ourselves always cherish every single day and love those around us.


kelv just shared this with me: there's always more to do in life or else we'll have nothing tomorrow to wake up to.


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all these turn of events and my yep experience has shaped me quite a bit. i've learnt to take things easier, look things at a brighter side and letting go things that are not meant to be.


as for you, tears still come to me when i think of you, when i try to think of why things have to turn out this way, when i think of all the happy memories, without a single sad one. but there dont seem to be any answers to any questions. maybe there are but i never get about asking you. so i stopped questioning myself and i gave up believing. my special friend, i wish you all the happiness you can find, be well (:





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i will post up more photos from my laos yep trip soon.

a paradise to me. during the extension at vang vieng. on our cycling trip to some caves.

1 Comments:

JOIN CAC!

if you want concrete plans and precious memories!

By  koon, at 19 June, 2008 07:40  

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